How long does five year serves? Well, honestly, not that long if you ask me...slowly i realized the true meaning of the time factor against your wisdom...no wonder people keep on emphasizing that time is short...i can see it now...It's not so much about what you've achieve within this short period of time, but more towards how much you are living it...looking back at all the crazy stuff I've done so far, i realized that i able to live my life the way i wanted it to be...i mean, free is one thing, but able to make a difference in your own way of life is remarkably an achievement on itself...Don't get me wrong, the system does have its benefits....but having it your own way have its strolls too...not able to have steady income...don't know when your next paycheck's gonna come also some of its traits...but for some reason, i still feel that i'm moving towards the right direction...why? I don't even have an ounce of fear within me...why? am i blinded by my goal? or i'm just plain stupid? Even i can't tell the difference, but people keeps on making their judgement...so yeah...its for me to know, and for them to figure it out...!!!
Love Life...!!!
It's been a roller-coaster ride so far...i mean, every time when i "think" i've met with "the one", then something else kicks in...suddenly the relationship got sour...or dry...as if they are judging me throughout the periods of getting to know each other...i totally understand the fact that you have doubts about who you be with...and how you always visualized how your life would be together...but from what i can see in my case was, it's more towards how you present yourself rather how you commit yourself...i guess women nowadays are more interested on what they see, rather then what they felt...honestly, in the "looks" department, i think i'm miles away from those other guys so to speak...but in terms of being an affectionate partner, i dint think that i'm far off from their scale...but again, that's its my own judgment...not them...
If that's the case, then the world is sad...it's not the world that i dreamed when i was a child...i still remember during those days, i never think about all this nonsense...everyone is equal on their ground...everyone is smiling to each other...no one ever talks about how rich their family is...or where did they go for their holidays....the worst would be how big is your lunchbox...and that's it...nothing more..and nothing less...its all about your heart...and how honest you are...i really miss those days...
Friends & Family...!!!
Well, so far i consider myself as lucky...i still got my family to cheer for me...friends to accompany me...some comes...and some goes...i guess that were meant to be...sad, but i have to face the fact that not everyone can ride along with what you rode...nevertheless, i am thankful that those people existed...even their role either to just to have a normal chats...or helping me to be at where i am right now...both are equally important...i can only wish the best for them and their life in the future...and apologies for not being a good friend...
One thing that i've learned about this matter is that you can only bring a certain group with you at one period of time...there will come to the times where they feel unhappy, or stressed out with what you do...those people that once were your backbone can be your own enemy when the times hit south...its nothing personal i guess, its just preferences has changed...either they are not the same person that they used to be before...or you are not the same person you used too...but one things are clear...you are not seeing eye to eye anymore...so separation is the best choice for me so far...not forever though...i still believe that someday in some faithful day, we will meet again..and hopefully in a different circumstances...
~A journey is not a journey unless you step both foot outside and run towards the horizon~
